Zendesk Third Impressions

 Rants, Jokes, Opinions, Tech Industry
May 182010
 

Awhile back, I wrote about the SaaS help desk company Zendesk and their “crazy girlfriend sales tactics.” Not only was the article a hit, but it prompted a very good response from Zendesk itself. As a result, I posted a fair-is-fair retraction and basically endorsed the company. Now it looks like I have to post a retraction.

Gone is my playful attitude. Gone are my good feelings about what could’ve remained a great “business companion”. What did I like and what went so suddenly and terribly wrong? Glad you asked.

The Good

Zendesk is quite good, despite a few limitations. It’s simple and straightforward. I speak only about the ticket tracking aspect as that is all I need. The web interface is pleasingly simple and the system itself is reasonably fast. The technical support (and even general PR responses) have been beyond stellar.

The Bad

The UI still needs some work. Zendesk mentions iPhone (and by extension, iPad) compatibility and that’s largely true. However, like a Flash-based solution, Zendesk uses some mouse-over UI actions (such as hovering to preview a ticket, menu access, etc.) which provides for an awkward user experience on a touch-based device that has no concept of “hover” or “mouse-over”.

As I painstakingly detailed, Zendesk had some problems with how it approached the conversion of trial customers to paying customers. I damn near told them to fuck off on that alone. As I just mentioned above, however, their response to this made up for the annoyance.

The Ugly

On May 18th, 2010, Zendesk announced (in a very complicated set of pages and an e-mail) their pricing would change. The customer responses in the comments of one such page weren’t just a groaning over a minor increase, they painted a picture of outrage, disgust, and (above all else) level-headed descriptions of how they might be able to justify a 10-15% inrease in the current economic downturn, but certainly not what can be up to a 300% increase in cost. Some even suggest reasonable pricing or an a la carté pricing scheme. See “What People Are Saying” below for a sampling of these comments.

What’s so wrong? There’s not too much added – certainly not enough to justify what can be up to a 300% price increase.

Zendesk offered a “grandfather” plan for existing customers at quarterly and yearly intervals. Unfortunately, this up-front payment only extends the current pricing for the duration of your pre-paid term. After that, even existing customers will have to pay the New and Improved Price.

On top of the massive increase in cost, the unpredictability of the cost of the service is not easily dismissed for any reasonable business owner or CTO. While the “Starter” plan they will offer still remains cheap – and, to be fair, still gives me what I need – there’s no guarantee they won’t pull the same dramatic increase stunt they did with their other plans.

Couple this unpredictability with their removing technical support (“community support” is “no support from us”, guys, let’s be real) and the ability to export your data from the Starter plan and the prospect of remaining a customer of theirs would be borderline stupidity.

What People Are Saying

The following comments were pulled from the page mentioned above in case they “disappeared”.

More than double what we’re paying or lose email support? Yeah, no thanks. We’ll begin the process of moving away from Zendesk today.

Please tell me there’s a typo somewhere here. My annual fee for Zendesk is going from $2124 to $4956?! I used “cost savings” as justification for moving to Zendesk with my upper management. That just went out the door.

I wish I could increase my prices 300% but I would have a mass exodus from my product! I think ZenDesk may have just made a huge mistake and I am sure many of their clients feel they are held hostage!

Why not just charge on an À la carte basis for new features that only a subsection of users will even be interested in?

One question for the Zendesk CEO or CFO – would you use a company who didn’t have a stable price plan you could predict, with price increases in line with RPI?

I’m just trying to wait it out before I have to break the news to my boss. All of our departmental spending is being scrutinized, and I don’t know that this increase will make it past Finance.

The fact that I have to even spend time think about this now after spending precious time integrating ZenDesk and educating staff makes me even more angry at ZenDesk. Booooh! ZenDesk, Booooh!

A reasonable increase in price for a additional in features is certainly to be understood or even expected. More than doubling the price I pay currently pay is not reasonable by any definition. As many others have pointed out, the ‘grandfather’ clause is merely a stay of execution.

If a business has no reasonable expectation or ability to forecast costs, a premises based solution will be the only way to go. Especially when you consider the fact that all our historical customer project data is housed with Zendesk and that their cancellation page says that it will all be deleted immediately and permanently upon cancellation.

…when using SaaS services, you expect stability and fair pricing. This is extortion and we WILL cancel our service and move elsewhere if required.

Come on be serious, this is extortionate.

I’m sorry Zendesk, but this is not how to treat your customers. A 10% increase or something would have been ok and I guess no one would be complaining. But this is really too much.

… and it goes on. Techcrunch also posted an article.

Conclusion

Zendesk has shown a lack of respect for its customers and their budgets. Some speculate they’ve planned to gain x number of customers, have the high-end customers invest hours and money in customizing and integrating the system, increase the price (and drop “low-end” customers) and show an overall increase in profits. I have to say that’s not a bad theory at all. I think I share it.

As I explained to “Olivia” (as I called her in previous posts), I feel threatened by this as a business owner. My information may no longer be mine to take with me if I decide to leave. I may have to face similar decisions even with the minimum plan if Zendesk suddenly decides their minimum pricing should be equally outrageous and they should even it out.

The bottom line is, I’m afraid I can’t endorse Zendesk any longer. Lack of predictability, no official support at an affordable price plan, and information lock-in add up to a big steaming pile of shit for $30/month. I’ll pass, thanks. Had I known then what I know now, I would never have signed up.

Update (May 20)

This has unfolded into an outright saga. CEO Mikkel Svane had some things to say on Twitter that didn’t exactly smooth things over:

I hope all the new sexy Zendesk features don’t drown in today’s noise.

Leaving office with headache. Not happy about pricing reactions. Less happy that it overshadows what an awesome system Zendesk has become.

While the second comment drew some fire (“the headache is of your own making” and similar sentiments), it was the first comment that really riled up Zendesk’s customers. Many were none too happy at their valid and reasonable complaints (many of which agree on a better approach at tiered pricing – more on that in a moment) having been blithely dismissed as “noise.” Some on Twitter have repeated, more or less, the same idea: “How Not to Treat Your Customers” or “How Not to Roll Out Price Increases.” Even Zendesk competitors are weighing in, offering price-matching and rate lock-in.

Of the many voices expressing outrage (and the few churlish pokes), a growing number of users actually suggested what I feel is a fair compromise. They would accept a fairly substantial price increase in return for tiered pricing. That is, the “exciting new features” (such as a basic implementation of forum software, which users point out is not as feature-rich as the many free, open-source alternatives available today) should be optional, as should the knowledge base features. The more services you use, the higher the pricing. Some even suggested they’d pay more for heavier volume.

I propose a mix of both. I personally only need the ticket tracking portion. For up to two people. For not too many tickets per month. I’d rather pay only for that, and if I decide later I need other features or if I suddenly start processing hundreds of tickets a month, I would expect to pay more.

For now, it looks like the company is in damage control mode (taking surveys, saying little). I now have a strong feeling the shareholders are behind this decision (‘pump-n-dump’ perhaps, or just outright cluelessness). True or not, I think there’s a whole lot of reconsideration going on right now. Either way, my faith in Zendesk has been severely shaken. I’m still planning to move to another service (and to take advantage of the sudden flurry of competition).

Google-itis

 Rants, Jokes, Opinions
May 172010
 

The SouthtownStar posted an article about “Google-itis,” which is a cutesy term for Internet-fueled hypochondria and/or self-diagnosis. It hit home a bit, as it made me think of a loved one going through the same thing. Hypochondria aside, “google-itis” can be dangerous.

I know several people suffering true social anxiety (some worse than others) for various reasons. A loved one close to me has been battling his own for years. A few years ago, however, he found what he thought to be a great resource: an internet forum for social anxiety sufferers.

At first I thought it was a good idea. There he could commiserate, gauge the intensity of his own suffering compared to others for context, vent, etc. I didn’t bother reading any posts on the forum myself. That was a mistake.

After awhile, listening to his descriptions and having read a few posts myself, I began to feel uneasy. It looked like a lot of self-diagnosis with no moderation by knowledgeable people. But it seemed to be helping him, so I only mentioned (several times) not to take people’s opinions there as gospel – they’re sufferers, not psychologists (or pharmacists). After all, I reasoned, the biggest problem with psychological problems is that we can’t see our own problems objectively – we can’t see ourselves from outside our own minds.

It’s only recently, however, I’ve been relieved to hear from his own mouth that this forum is bad news. I would call it dangerous. Virtually every thread is full of self-diagnosing wanna-be pharmacists, describing the interactions of these drugs with brain chemistry (using general terms) as if they fully grasp these complex systems with no degrees whatsoever. There are no psychologists serving as moderators. There are no volunteer pharmacists to debunk misinformation or gently explain that individual brain chemistry is far more complicated an issue. There is no voice of reason to tell someone firmly, “you don’t know what you’re talking about and you’re giving people dangerous advice.”

No, their information comes from what they’ve read online. They describe how they use this drug and that, mixed with a little of this or that, augmented by that, etc. Some make recommendations about what medications another should try. Some even go so far as to recommend illegal drugs (with no mention of precise dose and no references to how these drugs actually achieve the purported affect), heedless of the possible disaster for someone with psychological problems. I’m not an anti-drug crusader or anything (I think the “war on drugs” is a colossal failure of public welfare), but it doesn’t take much intelligence to see what a bad idea this is.

Some of the advice amounts to, “you should augment tricyclic antidepressants with LSD.” Yeah, that’s a great idea. I can see it now, “Works for me … I haven’t murdered a kitten with a staple remover in weeks!”

Yes, I’m conflating anxiety and psychopathy for comedic effect, but here’s a fun fact: “social anxiety” can be a satellite condition around a more serious general psychological issue.

What’s most dangerous about forums like this is, like anywhere else online, all some ass-hat has to do is use the relevant terminology (correctly or incorrectly, it doesn’t matter) and speak authoritatively to make the sheep follow. These sheep, however, are desperate for a solution for a real problem and since “psychological problems” can also include messiah complex and narcissism, this combination makes the ass-hats with an audience all the more dangerous.

I’m happy to say my own loved one has seen this for what it is, but if you suspect someone in your life is falling into the “google-itis” trap (whether for hypochondria or a true illness), it’s up to you to point out what a dangerous idea it is to put their faith into a “resource” where any ass-hat can claim to be an expert.

Hypochondria can be funny – even endearing – most of the time. Googling the psychopharmacological advice of self-described experts who suffer psychological illnesses themselves is a bad idea.

Transcriva Reviewed on LINK

 Bartas Technologies, Recognition & Reviews
May 072010
 

Fahad Faruqui posted a review of Transcriva 2 on LINK. It was a nice, well-rounded view of Transcriva’s strengths.

Even if you’re woefully analog, Transcriva 2 is easy to use, efficient and customizable—making transcription both easier and faster.

Thanks for the mention, Fahad!

Random Pre-Sleep Thought #3

 Random
Apr 272010
 

I thought I’d add to my growing body of strange phrases from my sleepy brain. This one happened a few weeks ago, but I hadn’t gotten around to writing about it yet. It’s also not so much a pre-sleep thought as a waking-up thought at the end of a dream (hypnopompic versus hypnagogic). I suppose the title should be “Random Post-Sleep Thought #1″ but shut up.

The background: I’ve been watching the new season of Nurse Jackie on Showtime. I suppose that’s to blame for the nurse-in-a-hospital-themed dreams I’ve been having lately. The intrepid nurse of my dream had just “inherited” the position of hospital director (don’t ask me how, I believe only doctors can hold that title but don’t quote me) because her mentor (the previous director) had just passed away.

As is usual in dreams, I knew her background automatically in the context of the dream. Just a few short years ago, she’d been burned out in her career and had been making poor choices. Essentially, she was on the path of self-destruction (much like Jackie). Then, the late director had taken her under his wing and gradually improved her, grooming her for the position. Though she had no idea she was being groomed for this position, nor that it had been “willed” to her (dream!), she was definitely up to the task, having grown as a person.

The only part of the dream I remember with clarity is some corny rock ballad you’d expect to be played for a character coming into their own. The words were interesting, though. The only part I could remember by the time I forced myself to wake up and write them down were the ones that haunted me. They were sung as if the late director were talking to her in a “just look at you now!” way. The line was:

Walkin round the waters of the Lake of the Used-to-be-You.

For some reason, that metaphor for triumphant introspection speaks to me deeply. I love the name “the Lake of the Used-to-be-You”. Lakes have long been a symbol for self-reflection. To “take a walk around the waters” suggests to me a deep introspection and (I suppose) looking back on one’s past.

I suppose this won’t mean the same to you as it does to me, but the words still move me a few weeks after I heard (thought) them.

Comedy Censored

 Rants, Jokes, Opinions
Apr 222010
 

Regarding the censored South Park episode aired last night … What Comedy Central did was cowardly, shameful, senseless, and wrong.

I make no secret about my opinions of organized religion. I have nothing against those who practice a faith that holds them to peace and tolerance, but I hate zealots and extremists who twist intentions to their prejudice and intolerance with all my being (that goes as much for Christianity as it does for Islam). My opinion is not an ignorant criticism of Muslims, it’s about Comedy Central’s reaction to extremist assholes spouting shit from their mouths.

The censorship wasn’t about offending a religion (if you know anything about South Park, you know that’s true – the show offended every religion), this was shameful cowardice at its worse. Even the end speech about fear was censored and it had no reference to the sacred cow of Islam. Comedy Central has shamed its country plain and simple. I’m so god damned disappointed we have so publicly bowed to the mere threat of terrorism over free speech.

For fucking shame, Comedy Central.

Zendesk Second Impressions

 Rants, Jokes, Opinions, Tech Industry
Apr 192010
 

Last week, I posted my e-mail response to the Zendesk representative I dubbed “Heidi” (obviously not her real name), wherein I compared her to a crazy ex-girlfriend, bent on constant reassuring contact. Zendesk got around to responding to that sentiment directly. Fair is fair, so I’m posting the rest of the conversation, which turned out rather positive. Second impressions can still make a difference, it seems.

Although my smart-ass reply was intended to provide laughs as much as to make my point about the fanatical contact, I made no attempt to hide the fact I was writing out of annoyance. Further, I made it clear I initially had no intention of replying unless I actually needed their help during my one-month trial (now just over a week old).

The Saga Continues

Not long after sending that e-mail (that evening in my time zone), I got a reply not from “Heidi”, but from “Bob” (as we’ll call him).

For reference, here is the original post containing the e-mail I sent in response to the two e-mails and a phone call just days after starting my trial.

Here was Bob’s reply:

Hi Joshua

Thanks for your email.

Ill pass on your feedback. It’s important for us to hear your thoughts and we appreciate your time.

Groan! Not only was it weighing in light on the give-a-damn-o-meter, but it looked like they used one of their own Macro responses.

Here’s my response:

Aw, come on! That long, heartfelt email and that’s all I get in response? Lame … ;-)

To be honest, Bob’s response looked exactly like the “Kindly fuck off and have a nice day” kind of responses I expect when I run my mouth to a company. I was wrong. Fast-forward two bottles of wine (between two people – shut up) and a day later. In an unprecedented act of bonafide give-a-damn, I received this from … aw, hell, let’s call this one “Olivia”:

Hi Joshua,

Where to begin … First, please don’t take our delayed response as an indication that we’ve been ignoring you. In fact everyone at Zendesk involved in connecting with customers on the phone or through email has thought about you several if not many times today.

Second, we weren’t sure how to reach out to you – how you wanted to be spoken to. Since you responded to the email below, we’re hoping this is the way that you wanted to hear from us.

Now, the most important thing that we want to say: we apologize for annoying you. We apologize for scaring you!

I’m happy to share with you why we screwed up but I’m pretty certain that’s not important to you. What’s important to us is that you have impacted how we do business. We’ve dialed back and taken time to correct very important things that were out of whack. What Bob said below wasn’t a pat response. But he should have put some effort into acknowledging the fact that we screwed up and that you had taken significant time to point this out to us in a colorful (hope that’s the right word) and creative way. And most importantly, he didn’t apologize. Please accept our apology and know that we don’t want to be a crazy girlfriend. We want to be sound, thoughtful, reliable and responsive.

You gave us a very measured response. Thank you for that. You’re a great writer. I hope you’ll stick with us and continue to write to us. You’re feedback is on target and we’d like to hear your thoughts about all areas of our service, or as many areas as you choose to comment on.

Again, we’re sorry for the lousy communication. Please let us know if there’s anything else we can for you.

Best regards,

Olivia

I’m an Ass

I might as well say it: my first response was to laugh my ass off. Not a cruel laugh, you see, but a surprised (and mildly delighted) laugh. A gleeful chortle, if you will. I was not expecting this kind of response at all. In fact, I wouldn’t have been too surprised if they’d “fired me” as a customer or asked me not to contact Heidi or Bob again.

Then, yesterday, I re-read the response. I was in a completely different mood, having just woken up from a nice long weekend sleep-in. I felt this odd sensation to which I’m not very accustomed. The damndest thing. I felt … bad. Yes, that’s it. I felt bad.

Now Matt tells me I shouldn’t. He believes it was a very positive outcome, but I still felt pangs of that unpleasent sensation known as “feeling bad” about one’s actions. Nasty stuff, that. All I know is Heidi hasn’t written me back (or called) once (or twice).

The Josh Problem

Okay, I’m used to entire offices discussing the “Josh Problem”. I’m an ass. Not necessarily an asshole. Just an overall ass. I speak my mind. I say what others are only thinking. I make light of serious situations even if I’m the one who’s on the hot seat.

Note: Prospective employers, please ignore that last comment. Current employers … meh, all that “consummate professional” shit was just pillow talk, baby. You knew what this was.

Emergency Meetings in the Situation Room

So, from Olivia’s response, I can only conclude that an emergency meeting had been called in the high-tech Zendesk situation room … my photo on the central screen, my blog post and e-mail spread out on their Microsoft Surface table, Heidi in a holding cell, un-showered and hungry, stripped of her black spandex tactical unitard, Bob in the next, weeping over getting himself involved.

Okay, so it probably didn’t go quite like that. Heidi was likely executed and I feel just awful about it. My intention was to be humorous, not a dick. So wherever you are, Heidi, I apologize. As I get older, I keep trying to find better ways to deal with life’s frustrations. I find humor is much better than frothing heat-of-the-moment phone calls, but it can have a bite to it nonetheless.

In any case, I’m glad they recognize how incredibly important I am and held an emergency meeting in their situation room. I worry over which picture of me they used, but that’s a minor thing, really. The important thing is, they reached out to apologize and took their power to annoy seriously. For that I’m thankful. It has definitely improved my opinion of Zendesk’s sales tactics (or at least their ability to apologize for said tactics).

Silver Lining

Now it’s important to mention that toward the beginning of all of this, I had been in contact with their support team over a macro that broke as soon as I created it. It wouldn’t even let me delete it. It took them a few days to try to figure out what went wrong before they had it fixed but it wasn’t a show-stopper for me by any means, so it didn’t bother me (well, it bothered my OCD to see it there without the ability to clean it up, but whatever). When I asked what it was (I thought their app might not have escaped a slash I put in the name or something like that), the tech responded with a link to a documented Ruby issue. Cool. Thanks. That impresses me. I know slightly more than shit about Ruby or Rails, but not much more, however the ability and willingness to share the technical details with me is definitely something I consider “good will”.

So I didn’t mean to imply it was all bad. In fact, I’m pretty sure I communicated effectively that I didn’t think that was the case.

The Make-Up Kiss

Here’s my response to Olivia:

Olivia:

I don’t really work on the weekends, so I actually wasn’t expecting any kind of response until today. I’m also aware I’m not the only person in the world, so no harm done there.

On one hand, I was amused to hear about the impact my e-mail had. On the other, I was surprised to get any kind of real response, other than “we’ve removed you from our contact list”. On a third hand, if I had one, I had started to feel kind of bad since I didn’t hear back from Heidi at all. Are she and Bob alright? If not, I trust it was quick and they didn’t suffer. ;-)

I accept your apology of course, but I’m not sure it was necessary. I did kind of poke you guys in the ribs a few times (with a large pole). Some would label me an ass for not just saying, “no further contact, thanks” but imagine what they’d say had I immediately returned Heidi’s phone call in the mood I was in. It was better to wait for later and I’m glad I did. That’s when the “crazy girlfriend like Betsie” idea hit me and I immediately found the situation funny. Once that occurred to me, I knew just how to handle it.

That was a true story, by the way. Betsie really was quite nuts.

At any rate, I detailed the ordeal on my blog (because I knew my friends and family would find it “très Josh”) so it’s only fair I laude Zendesk’s followup (and of course sensationalize that too).

It should be posted shortly, but I wanted to respond to you beforehand for two reasons. First, it’s just the right thing to do, and second, because I wanted to post my response to you as well.

So: thanks for following up and thanks for rethinking the frequency and nature of contact … and yes, “colorful” is a good word. :-)

Regards,

– Josh

I felt it was only right to explain my position a bit just in case there were any hard feelings. So overall, I have good feelings about the folks at Zendesk. I hope they feel the same about me (Heidi? Bob? We cool?).

Maybe I’ll e-mail, call, then e-mail again once in awhile to see if they still love me. ;-)

Update: Oh man. I knew they killed them!

iPad Saving My iPhone Battery

 Rants, Jokes, Opinions, Tech Industry
Apr 162010
 

I’ve noticed a much better battery life with my iPhone since getting my iPad. Seems it’s completely changed my iPhone usage patterns.

For one thing, I often reached over to the stand on which my iPhone rests for quick things like checking an incoming email. Even with my laptop right in front of me, it was just quicker to grab the phone. I’m not doing that at all anymore. 

Another thing is wireless usage. When a WiFi network is available, I tend to have and be using the iPad anyway. Where WiFi networks aren’t, I usually don’t have the iPad with me and the iPhone’s 3G connectivity is the default. In response, I’ve turned off the iPhone’s WiFi radio. This did even more to improve my phone’s battery life, returning it to what I once enjoyed with my not-so-smart phones.

I’m definitely not regretting getting my iPad, that’s for sure.

Zendesk First Impressions

 Rants, Jokes, Opinions, Tech Industry
Apr 152010
 

At the very end of last week, I started a one-month free trial with Zendesk, a web-based help desk a la FogBugz. I chose it for its simplicity and am so far happy with the system itself, even with a minor technical hiccup. It’s the crazy-girlfriend-like sales tactics that bug me a little (a lot).

I started the trial five days ago. Within a day or so, Heidi (we’ll call her) e-mailed me asking me how things were going. I honestly couldn’t answer – I’d only used it for a grand total of twenty minutes or so, spread out over a one-to-two-day period. I also wasn’t interested in conversing at the moment, so I ignored the e-mail.

In an all-too-frequent moment of customer service prescience, I was concerned that I’d be hounded, so I was happy to see an “opt out of further communications” link at the bottom of her e-mail. I clicked it and opted out, then deleted the message.

Yesterday – four days after starting my one month trial – I received a phone call from an unidentified number. I always screen unknown numbers, so I waited for the voice mail notification and listened. Who was it but Heidi, explaining she tried e-mailing me but hadn’t heard back. She reiterated her desire to know how I liked Zendesk.

As I’m listening to this voice mail with a mild bit of annoyance, I get an e-mail. From Heidi. She wanted to make sure I got her e-mail and voice mail … and wanted to know how I liked Zendesk.

Now, if you don’t know me well, it may shock you to hear I become annoyed easily and am quite vocal about it. I had to resist the urge to call her back and bitch her out for the incessant intrusion. She reminded me of a crazy ex-girlfriend I had in junior high school … when I had girlfriends.

Then I had another idea. Rather than lash out when asked what I thought, I related a relevant story. Here’s what I ended up sending Heidi (modified somewhat for clarity).

Heidi:

I’ll tell you my first impressions but I want you to think about it from my perspective as you read. But first, a tale of young love.

When I was in junior high school, I did the unthinkable: I got myself a girlfriend. Well, really, the girlfriend got me. We’ll call her Betsie. “Will you go with me?” Betsie asked, using the common phrase (at least in my part of the world). Oh, if only I had said no …

You see, Betsie was known to be “out there”. Didn’t bother me at the time; I like “out there”. She wrote me three notes a day. Long ones. Every evening she would keep me on the phone for hours. Being the typical teenage boy, I found this a bit excessive, but I did my best to keep up with the sheer volume. It was normal, right? To my credit, this went on for three weeks – practically a lifetime for a young romance. Several times, though, I’d have a bad day and just be content to talk a bit. Of course I would try to tell her this, but to Betsie, it was always taken as a prelude to a breakup.

At first, I would tell her I still loved her and nothing was wrong; I was just having a bad day. After awhile, the little things I did or didn’t do would trigger this insecurity. I began to feel like a captive, a slave to reply note writing, return phone calls, and constant reassurances.

Then it happened. When she asked me if I was going to break up with her for the 5143746253745th time, I hesitated. After all, by this time her fear was becoming a self-fulfilling prophesy. It was only the briefest of hesitations but it was enough for Betsie.

Her tone changed immediately. Suddenly she was deathly serious. Despite this she managed to make it sound almost nonchalant – perhaps it was her sigh – when she said, “I think if you would ever break up with me I’d kill myself.”

Wait, what?

I was thirteen … what would I do? Tell my parents? Tell hers? Yeah, right: “I made my girlfriend/your daughter want to kill herself. Thought you should know.” So I did the only thing sensible to a teenage boy: I kept it to myself.

This went on for awhile (a few days) until I finally realized she was doing it for attention. More to the point, she was doing it in a desparate attempt to keep her boyfriend. Ultimately I broke up with her. She’s still alive and well and now married to a man I must assume enjoys her quirks. She even invited me to her wedding a few years ago. I politely made an excuse and declined.

My point?

Nothing makes people want to break up more than an insane girlfriend/boyfriend.

I just started using Zendesk at the end of last week. I ignored your email partly because I had no opinion yet and partly because – and please don’t take this the wrong way – I just want to use the application and would like you guys to stay the hell out of my way unless I need you.

Like Betsie, however, you emailed, then you called (!!!), then emailed immediately thereafter to make sure I got your voice mail. All in less than a week of my starting the trial. That’s a bit … much.

So, there you have it: The jury is still out on Zendesk as a product, but I have to say, the insistent, voluminous “do-you-love-me?!?!” notes and calls are scaring me little. Especially after I opted out of your first email.

Simply put: Could you dial it back, please? :-)

Now I’ll say I’m pretty sure I’ll convert to a paid account and stick with Zendesk. Unless something drastic happens to piss me off, I have no real complaints. It’s reasonably quick for a Ruby on Rails web app and it has the features I need without all the “our-way-or-no-way” required fields that annoyed me about FogBugz.

Rest assured, however, if they keep nagging me to tell them I love them, I’ll drop them like a Betsie.

Update: The saga continues here: Zendesk Second Impressions

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